Relationships, however beautiful they may be will eventually come to an end most of the time. I may not know your reasons for choosing to end it with someone who once meant the entire World to you but am sure you could have a few reasons of your own. Ending a relationship has never been a sin. The sin however, would be how you choose to end that relationship.
In most cases, a person may not even be hurt by the fact that you broke up with them but they may be hurt by he way that you chose to end things.
There are breakups that turn out very disrespectful and it therefore becomes very difficult to move on, not because of unending love but rather anger that came from how the relationship ended.
There are ways that you can choose to end your relationship that will still show respect to the person that you are breaking up with.
This will not only prove that you are respectful and considerate but it will also ease the other part’s pain faster than you could even imagine. Remember that sometimes the break up does not even matter but the way that it is initiated will always matter.
She broke up with me in the most disrespectful way. She did not even call, she did not reach out but she sent a text.
Yes, a text! One of those rude texts that tells you to look forward and move on, those texts that tell you were not good enough for her and that she felt she deserved more . She sent a text that she was tired of settling for less as she deserved more.
How to end a relationship respectfully.
End it in person.
Has someone ever broken up with you over text? That is the lowest blow you could ever receive. Not even a phone call but a text. Do not choose to break up in such a way because not only is it disrespectful but it will make you the coward. The coward you are is not able to face the other person and call it off so you chose to text!
If you are to end a relationship, ask the person to meet up with you and have a serious talk with them about your feelings, where you feel wronged and state your reasons as to why you want to break up with them. Say it face to face that you no longer want to date. That is more appropriate and mature.
Be more honest than brutal.
Do not try to cover up the reasons you have for wanting to break up. Be completely honest and refrain from lying about the reasons as to why you want out from the relationship. As you are being honest however, don’t forget to do it politely. Never let yourself confuse honesty with brutality.
You should remember that the person you are breaking it off with is human and once upon a time, they were the most important person to you. Do not act like they did not mean everything to you at a particular point in time.
Get a confidant.
If it is weighing down on you too much, then find someone you can trust and talk to them about this. Whether you are unsure about the break up or why you want to do it in the first place, you can talk to someone you trust about it. When you talk about it, it will help you gather your thoughts.
This confidant will guide you on where you are wrong in your stand. They will also guide you on how to break it off in a way that will not be painful for both you and the person you are separating from.
Be respectful.
The best way to end a relationship is with respect. Attach respect to a person even when you are breaking up with them. That should not be a reason for you to disrespect them. No matter where this person wronged you, am sure there are a few good things that they did for you when the two of you were still a pair.
Keeping the good memories in mind, try to respect the person even when you are separating from them.
Think through what you have to say carefully.
Before you say absolutely anything, you need to think on it critically. Do not approach someone demanding for a break up without even thinking through everything you need to say to their face. Keeping In mind everything that you went through as a couple, you need to be careful with your words.
Watch your mouth because you do not know how bad a word can hurt a soul. Tame your mouth and avoid being mean.
Listen to the other party.
When you are asking for a break up, it is not about you walking up to this person and airing out your views then leaving them with their thoughts. Make it a point to listen to them. It will not make your ears bleed if you spare a few minutes to also let this person say something about the relationship.
Remember that just because you are initiating the break up does not mean your entirely innocent from all the causes of the break up. Listen to what they have to tell you. You never know you could also have a few things to work on or change before you get into another relationship.
Talk about something you liked about them.
As you break up with someone, do not be quick to say bad things about them. Compliment them. If you have chosen to tell them about your reason for wanting a break up and it has something to do with their bad habit, make sure to also mention something good about them to uplift their mood a little.
Am sure this person is not entirely bad and this is why you dated them in the first place.
As you leave, do not leave this person feeling worthless. Tell them something nice about themselves that they should make sure to carry into the other relationship.
Most people fail to move on after a break up because they only heard bad things about themselves during the break up so they do not feel good enough to date anyone else.
Appreciate their previous efforts.
Even when this person has hurt you, if there is something good they ever did for you or there is a time they ran to your rescue, appreciate them for this even before you state why you would like to end the relationship.
Frequently Asked Questions
What makes people fail in love?
Non-acceptance, lack of trust, and poor communication will kill any relationship. The good news is that you can avoid these common killers of relationships by identifying them when they come up, looking within, and committing to doing the hard work required to make your relationship last.
What usually ends a relationship?
Common causes for breakups include personality differences, lack of time spent together, infidelity, lack of positive interactions between the couple, low sexual satisfaction, and low overall relationship satisfaction. Ending a relationship is one of the most difficult things we have to do.
How do you know a relationship isn't working?
Conflicts that drag on for months, arguments that go around in circles, fights that don't lead to more empathy, intimacy or better solutions — these are all signs that something is fundamentally dysfunctional in the relationship.
How do you know when its time to break up?
If your partner makes you angry, miserable, or bored often and if it is very hard for you to explain the reasons why you still love this person, it's an obvious sign that you should go your own path. If you feel suffocated in a relationship and if the negatives overshadow the positives, it's time to move on.
When to leave a relationship?
If both partners are giving equally, the relationship will work. But if your partner takes you for granted or doesn't respect you, that means trouble. Sometimes this is a result of relationship stressors that can be fixed. If you feel deeply that your partner no longer values you, it could be time to leave